Question of the Day

Q: I just don’t know where to begin!

Fri, 3 Apr 2009 10:37:52 -0400

A: Start an easy-to-complete project! Think of decluttering as a marathon, not as a sprint. Too many times, clients come to me and say, “I want to clean my BASEMENT or my ATTIC.” Well, those are really TOUGH projects because they’re like quicksand -- it’s easy to go in, take a few steps and sink! Start with simple projects to build your “decluttering” muscle!

Here are a few simple ones:

Your refrigerator. Start throwing out all those “mystery meats” and ketchup packets you got from the Chinese restaurant last year. This will help you get used to throwing things out.
Your “off-season” closet.
Your computer table.
A shelf.

Q: I am a hoarder. Whenever I give anything away,  I have nightmares so I stop.

Thu, 29 May 2008 09:45:14 -0400

A: First, please consider professional help for your hoarding. Many therapists are now recognizing that hoarding is often a symptom of other mental health issues such as Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder or depression. The website www.helpinghoarders.com offers a list of therapists nationwide who specialize in hoarding. Also, please check out the Resources section of my website for books and other websites and support groups.

Please be aware that anxiety is not an uncommon feeling when decluttering, and it’s OK!! As clutterbugs, we are often AFRAID of our true feelings -- that’s why we try to bury our feelings in clutter. When you are most anxious, STOP for a minute, SIT DOWN and BREATHE. Any item you “let go of” is REPLACEABLE (for proof, check out eBay -- everything and I mean EVERYTHING -- is there.) Think about your NEW life ahead: a life of hospitality, peace and freedom! Think about the people who will benefit from the things you give away. Think about how your home can become a place where you LIVE, and not just a small residential landfill!

Lastly, consider taking a class. I teach classes throughout the year. While I like to think that people return week after week for me, I know that many people return for THE SUPPORT they get from their classmates. We’re all in this together!

How Do I Decide What to Keep?

Thu, 7 Feb 2008 09:22:09 -0500

Q: I don’t know how to MAKE THE DECISIONS when I look at a pile of my clutter. How do you know what to keep?

A: It comes down to three questions:

Do I love it?

Is it useful?

Do I find it beautiful?

For most people, the problems come when they debate over things for which they have NEGATIVE feelings, like guilt. Because they have a difficult time dealing with negative feelings, they shy away from actually doing anything about the clutter.

Dealing with Mother's Things

Fri, 1 Feb 2008 09:37:18 -0500

Q: My mother has Alzheimer’s and lives in an assisted living community. I currently have most things from her home at my house. Occasionally, she’ll ask for items from her past and now I’m afraid to let go of her things in case she asks for them! What should I do?

A: First, I’m sorry to hear your mother has Alzheimer’s. It must be devastating for you and your family. My grandmother had dementia in her last year of life and like your mother, she used to ask my family for things from her past, principally hats from the traveling hat salesman who used to visit her rural community! Well, those hats were long gone. In your case, she may also ask for items you no longer have, like items from her childhood.

Let go of her things and keep only what YOU love and reminds you of times when your mother was healthy. Ask a social worker at her community for advice and suggestions on how to handle her agitation when you can’t provide her items. Another source of information would be your local Alzheimer’s Association.

Good luck to you and your family.

Question of the Day

Q: I just don’t know where to begin!

Q: I am a hoarder. Whenever I give anything away, I have nightmares so I stop.

How Do I Decide What to Keep?

Dealing with Mother's Things

Q: I am a hoarder. Whenever I give anything away,  I have nightmares so I stop.